Mental Health Issues Even if you're not taking meds, struggling with mental health issues can mess with your sex life on every front, including in the orgasm department. But in many cases, these meds are life-saving, and going off them isn't worth the risk. Anxiety and depression can both suppress sexual desire , which may result in DE as well. In that case, Butcher said, he can get an erection but can't get to the same threshold neurologically with a real-life partner as when masturbating. Once again, pushing your boo to look into counseling — either traditional therapy or couples counseling — can help them work through some of these anxieties. But even if your dude doesn't take quite that long, any sex that goes on way past the point of pleasure for you and, quite possibly, him can count. Maybe you have a fear of being truly vulnerable and intimate with someone? A heavy-duty masturbation style involving a grip or speed impossible to replicate during sex with another human being is one of the most common culprits behind delayed ejaculation. In my sex therapy office, I encourage couples to give a man who has difficulty ejaculating the same consideration. Masturbation Style If you dude spent the decade before he met you and your vagina gripping his penis as if it were an umbrella in a windstorm, then of course trying to orgasm from traditional intercourse will be difficult for him. SSRI antidepressants — like Prozac, Lexapro, Zoloft, Paxil, Celexa, and others — are notorious for messing with users' sex drives , and they can make orgasms difficult or even impossible to achieve.